Just a Lil more about myself

I actually like peas, lima beans & cilantro..
I cannot stand Scooby Doo (maybe because my mother was a speech & hearing pathologist)
I never ever ever called him "Boo"...
I love lard in my refried beans!
I'm more Rhoda then Mary...
I found out today that William of Wales's surname is Mountbatten-Windsor
I love movies about the 15th century but I don't do fairs where dudes wear tights...
I still well up when I think of my deceased Guinea Pig..
I still well up when I think of my BMW...
Why do we care about those 16 & pregnant chicks?
Why do I have to buy six Genie Bras when I only want one?
I had a big ass slug come out of my garden hose the other day. OMG so GROSS!!
When I imagine what God looks like I always think of Morgan Freeman..

More advice from the "Diff" !

If you really love a pair of earrings & they are not too expensive, buy two pairs in case you lose one.
Grits, cottage cheese & wheat germ make a divine breakfast.
Take a tylenol or vicodin before a bikini wax.A glass wine makes you too relaxed & one needs to be tense.
I can of corn is awesome in cornbread.
Don't eat too many carbs at night.
When you make dinner in a crock pot, make sure it's turned on AND plugged in.
I have no advice about love other then appreciate your family because things change.
More later, boiling potatoes xoxo

Ramble On

Leaves are falling all around, it's time I was on my way (extradition?)
Thanks to you, I'm obliged for such a pleasant stay (I hear Utah is the best)
But now it's time for me to go.The autumn moon lights my way.
For now I smell the rain & with it pain, & it's headed my way(that's not rain you smell & the pain is a kidney stone)
Ramble on,and now's the time, the time is now to sing my song (spare us please)
etc...etc...

Mine's a tale that can't be told, my freedom I hold dear (don't get use to it)
How years ago in days of old when magic filled the air (was this "magic" from Humboldt or Mexico?)
T'was in the darkest depths of Mordor, I met a girl so fair (Mordor needs better lighting & she was pretty drunk)
But Gollum, and the evil one crept up & slipped away with her,her,her..yeah (What? I don't speak gnome or hobbit...whatever..)
I gotta ramble on sing my song...gotta keep searching for my baby...I can't find my blue bird.( good luck with that)

The Immigrant Song

Ah, ah,
 We come from the land of ice & snow (actually I grew up in Santa Barbara but I have been to Tahoe).
From the midnight sun where the hot springs flow( I have a jacuzzi at the condo).
The hammer of the gods will drive our ships to new lands (keep your" hammer" away from my "new land")
To fight the horde,singing and crying: Valhalla, I am coming! (finding a parking place to get to Sephora ?)
On we sweep with threshing oar ( blond outriggers?), Our only goal will be the western shore (do you still have my number?)
How soft your fields of green, can whisper tales of gore (The Inconveint Truth?)
Of  how we calmed the the tides of war.We are your overlords (as if !)
So now you'd better stop and rebuild all your ruins (yeah easy for you to say).
For peace and trust can win the day despite all of your losing.(That's what I'm counting on.. )

Mother Of The Year

I have never had a dog that goes everywhere with me. I like to take mine on short errands etc. Today much to my horror I closed my window when Alphie had his head sticking out. He freaked, I freaked & William was pretty calm...evidently in my state of panic I closed the window even more, locked the window & the door. Thank goodness Wills had a level head & did what needed to be done to fix the situation. I spoke to my sister & said "It was awful, the noise he was making was something I have never heard...like someone was killing him!"
she responded "well someone kind of was"...

Amber & Alphie

Okay so I have these two dogs now. They are so wonderful. I have no complaints other then then the fact that they do their "business" on the sidewalk or street. Why not the ice plant? If someone is walking in the ice plant then they deserve to step in their "deal"...Also they have very precious names & I am not a precious girl.. I'm thinking of changing them to Ambien & Alpha Blocker...I dunno

Walkie walkie!

I have two dogs now. One blond & one red head. It's very nice & I don't have to bring them coffee in the morning or listen to the his theory of what really happened during 911. The only things these dogs have in common with the last dog is big sad brown eyes & they sit down when they pee.

Hey!

Been gone for awhile. I have had a week or so where I had to focus on things other then myself  (sucks but doable). I shall continue my dialog on my adventures soon..xoxo
Lil

Where is that corkscrew!!

You know how they talk about the power of suggestion? Vision boards all that stuff? Some people have gone as far as saying once they hung pictures of happy couples they found their soul mate. I looked around the 800 square foot laundry hamper...I have a vintage Fiesta poster which is two people dancing but they look like brother & sister.The rest of my objet d' art consists of  the Virgin Mary, botanical  pictures, crosses, & Victorian women. Oh I do have a picture of Thomas More & his wife....she is saying goodbye to him before he goes to the Tower of London  prior to his execution... If I don't change my decor, I am going to be a tango dancing nun that likes to garden...

Random thoughts watching Will & Grace...

My luck with men is so bad Andrew Luster wouldn't buy me a drink...
My luck with men is so bad I got dumped an alleged drug trafficker & Daniel Boone in the same month...
When my ex BF picked my son up from school, one of his friends asked "who's the homeless guy?"
My butt is so small if I didn't have boobs I could slide under the door...
My Doctor's actually look forward to seeing me...I'm "easy money" & I make them laugh & I have never been found naked & hiding in a bush...sobbing...lately..jk








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Keep it real..light salt please

I think George W Bush got a bad rap.Some people thought he was stupid. People who graduate from Yale & serve in the Air Force are not stupid.The one thing that is proof of W's lack of stupidity is his quick wit or as he puts it a quick tongue. When I had a job that required  I make small talk with the public, I would come home  mentally exhausted. I told my friend about it & she told me that it was because I always have so much going on in my head. There is my "kind" perception of people, my "dark" perception of people, what I want to say & what I know I should say. Can you imagine standing at a podium & having a bunch of d bag reporters asking/ barking at you? I would of loved it if he just let loose once! Maybe that's Sarah Palin's problem? There is nothing wrong with saying you can see Russia from your house. If you saw Russia from your house & you lived in Orcutt, that would be a problem. I'm not trying to be political.I was not a fan of Bill Clinton but even my husband who was VERY conservative would say that Clinton would be the kind of neighbor he would enjoy talking over the fence with..I don't care if Obama smokes. Crap, I'd be drinking bloody Mary's every morning if I had that job!!

Good Girl...GOOD Girl

 Good Girl has a level head... GOOD Girl gives level head
 Good Girl dates a prosecutor.. GOOD Girl dates the prosecuted
 Good Girl has junk in the trunk... GOOD Girl has junk in her trunk
  Good Girl cleans up her messes...GOOD Girl makes messes




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