Rat or JRT?

So I had this friend up this weekend to help me around the house. He did some very good work & is pretty type A, but you can't do much when you take 4 naps a day (alone). I had a boyfriend who use to often fall asleep on the couch. When did men turn into cats? When did I turn into a terrier bitch? I want my tennis ball thrown & I want to be walked. Fresh water & Science Diet with a regular "bone"..ruff!

Damn I am interesting...

LOVE Crest 3D Whitestrips with Advanced Seal (I have swallowed more then I care to admit!)
Born Sandals
My Victoria Secret Black card
Heiniken ( I don't know how to spell it!)
The fact that my hair is brown & my eyes (though crappy) are greener then green
Taco Bell, Charlie's & Orcutt Burger
Macy's, Nordies & Saks
Cambria, Fess Parker & Core Wine
Needles
Being kissed by someone I adore..I can not emphasize that enough...
Bavarian Motor Works
Toyota Land Cruisers
Dogs with big hearts & short legs..
Teardrop earrings
Makeup & skin care
My Nuwave oven!!
More later..it will be worth it :)
I don't mention my family because duh! We love each other cause we have to! xxxxoxoxo

What? Can't be!!

Okay so I have been trying to lose weight. I have been watching what I eat & staying active.I even walk to the liquor store & the Olde Towne Market (they have McConells)..I gained two pounds yesterday! I was trying to figure out why?...I had pineapple, a banana, three tootsie pops, two Jack in the box tacos, a Queen Burger from Charlie's, two bloody Marys...stupid banana.

Things Lil Diffy doesn't "get"...

I don't understand what is so great about the Princess Bride..
Crab legs? It is so much work & so messy! Found some in my hair once...I hope it was mine..
Why was God so cruel to create hair loss? People get cold!
Sweat breads.. Really?
Edible bouquets..The only one in my house eating that "thing" would be my guinea pig.
Why won't my son clean his room & watch Marcus Welby MD with me? Wow, a young Jan Michael Vincent..sweet
Blond men don't age well.I have been around more leather then a cowgirl at Jedlicka's on sale day!

Oh, now THAT is something shiny!!!

I had never seen one before. It was so beautiful it made me gasp. It was like a Faberge egg or Judith Leiber Oscar Night handbag..It was a brand new gold BMW!! I would of fallen to my knees but I was driving..not sure what series it was...it was the FABULOUS series...as it drove off & I pulled in to purchase my large diet coke, a car exactly like my red Ford Fusion drove by...well, not exactly...I don't have faded stuffed animals tucked in the corners of my back window..

Guinea Pigs & Sneakers...

 When Snoe' passed I put her in a Converse shoe box, you know they are really narrow? I got some Converse high tops for my son & I almost threw the box away but I kept it for Yumi when her time comes...how sad is that? I'm spending too much time at home. I was outside & the Jehovah Witness ladies are all" Hi Cathy, beautiful day! You working in your garden?" They are so nice...do they drink wine?
It's interesting I have been heartbroken since June of last year. I'm not anymore & I have closure, but not being heartbroken has left a void... It's like I put that part of my life in a ALL*STAR box & the trash man took it away...

How to make soup & influence people!

3 cooked skinless chicken breasts
1can  Chicken Noodle Soup
1 can Golden Mushroom soup
About 3 cups water
2 cans chopped tomato, sweet onion & garlic
2 cups salsa (the kind you get in the refrigerator section)
I can bean sprouts drained
3 cups shredded cabbage
Hefty amount of garlic powder
Table spoon celery flakes
2 to 3 Table spoons chunky peanut butter
Toss it all in a big pot..cover & bring to boil just for a moment...then simmer on low

People are so funny!

I didn't mean to hook up with him...I couldn't find the coffee filters..
I am not passive aggressive. My friends at work gave me a Birthday card that said so..
Officer, I don't think you understand...it wasn't my drinking that caused the accident it was my sleeping.
I know he loves me because he said so.Men don't lie about such things when sex is involved.
Really? I didn't know tailgating was illegal. I just thought I was just being obnoxious?
When telling my shrink I was devastated because my ex BF was in legal trouble she said "what a dumb ass!" I would of taken a different highway!"
Oh how I could go on & I will later..

Wow! Thanks :)

My sister & I grew up as the only children in our family.Christmas morning was spent making quiche & margaritas & waiting for our Great Aunt & Uncle to arrive from the Biltmore..which was like 2 minutes away.Every year it got later & later. For years our Great Aunt & Uncle got us stuff from the Speigel Catalog. Twice they sent us a game called Don't Bug Me...I'm sure it was just an error :) The gift that we REALLY enjoyed was the USA savings bonds!! My sis cracked me up when she said "we would have to wait till 1 o'clock to open our gifts & 7 years to play with them!

The Adventures Of Lil & Sally!

Since I have been a Blogger (I have been called worse) all these memories have come flooding back...My BFF Sally (not her real name but just as WASP or WASC in our case) lived in this beautiful house on an acre in Montecito. Well, she had these neighbors that were just no fun.I'm guessing they had an acre too & it bumped up against Sally's.One day Lil & Sally & another friend who will remain nameless...I think she goes by a number now anyway...had this brilliant idea to drive this friends car across Sally's property & across the neighbors yard to get to the road...of course we got stuck....it was just a field...I had not seen that kind of disdain from those grumps since the Halloween my friends & I dressed up like the Manson family (not the animals that brutally murdered those poor people, just moronic hippies) & they wouldn't give us any candy...some people just need to lighten up..

Things I waste my time thinking about...

Ina Garten's (The Barefoot Contessa) must have the most boring closet ever..
Does Jack from Jack In the Box have a different wife?
How would my life be different if I didn't go to that party in 1979?
How would my life be different if I didn't go to that party in 2009?
How would my life be different if I didn't go to any parties?
What is Charlie the Schnauzer barking about?
That lady at the gym has purple hair! My niece has pink hair but she's like 22 & like cute...
Pajama Jeans? Really?
I don't like Spanx...they make me feel like Pilsbury cookie dough..
Should I finish the Hagen Daz or the chicken? Both!!

Me me ME!!!

I always wanted to be an actress but I don't like plays..The only thing worse then watching one is being in one...
 Mexican food is the best especially off a truck!
I often hang with guys that are prettier than I am...lol
Taylor  Swift is kind of strange looking...not in a bad way...just strange...
All I ever cook is meat & vegetables..wait, I made Tator Tots Oscar Night..
I loved the show Family & I liked the fact that the mom was cool but not warm & fuzzy...
My ears are lopsided..I always wear sunglasses that cover my eyebrows..
My vanity is legendary but I don't have a Trout Pout or Made In Goleta's...rather get my vision fixed
I don't have a tattoo & I only have one hole in each ear...My mom & I got our ears pierced the same day..she waited till she was 40 because in her day only "cheap" girls had pierced ears..
My sister is the smartest person I know & my dad started college (Cornell) at 16..
Everyone on my side of the family is quick witted...even the Terrier/Whippet mix had a tude..
People think I'm a crappy driver..
More to come...my chicken is calling!